Posts Tagged ‘Talking’

So I’ve been incredibly lazy these last couple of days, and yet not so lazy all at the same time. I haven’t gotten any cleaning done around the house, I keep making The Boyfriend walk Kaeidyn to school, and I’ve been making him do the laundry and the cooking. He’s been wonderful and just picks up all the slack and hardly complains about it at all.

I’ve been feeling very weak and tired and sore lately. I got out of bed today and all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. I was trying so hard to stay awake on the couch, but I kept dozing off. Again, The Boyfriend was a sweetheart and let me go back to sleep until I had to go pick Kaeidyn up from school.

Then Mama T came over, and the kids suckered her in to letting us go over there. Had a super delicious barbecued pork supper with corn on the cob. It really is my most favorite vegetable in the world. Mama T had four cobs, and a can of corn. The cobs were meant for us adults, but the kids weren’t having that and shared with Mama T and Chef, and then devoured what wasn’t finished on mine and The Boyfriend’s.

Yesterday or maybe the day before, we were convinced Carter had chicken pox. He woke up and his entire chest and back and up his neck was covered in these little red dots. Had them in his armpits, diaper line, everywhere but his legs and arms. Then we went to sleep and when we woke up they were almost gone, but by the afternoon they were back with a vengeance and had multiplied.

Today, you can hardly tell at all. He has a cold, but that’s it. We’re thinking it might be a bit of heat rash mixed with the crawling on the carpet. It seems to get worse when it’s warmer in the house. I’ve made a doctor’s appointment for tomorrow and we’re getting that and his mark on his foot. He’s had it since we brought him home from the hospital, and we’re chalking it up to a birth mark. But it’s gotten darker and I just want to get it checked out, being that it hasn’t been there since he was born.

Kaeidyn’s year-end review is coming up in a couple weeks. I’m excited to see how much she’s improved. I don’t know how the whole transition from Kindergarten to Grade 1 goes, so we’ll be discussing that too. The Boyfriend and I have been in charge of walking her to school everyday this week, though I think only once did I take her to school. She even prefers The Boyfriend walking her to school, and most days when I go pick her up from school, she sees me and excitedly yells, “Mommy” and then gives me a quizzical look and says, “Why couldn’t The Boyfriend come pick me up?”.

Keirnan officially has more than one word in his vocabulary. It’s still mostly just understanding him through pointing. “Airplane” and “Bicycle” are now his two favorite words, and as we’re driving or walking or sitting in the house, if he sees or hears these things, he screams the word out with delight. I hate this point in the talking game, because it’s the most frustrating part. They know what they want, and they’re trying to say it, and you’re trying to understand but you can’t, and they’re saying it over and over and getting more and more frustrated by the fact that you can’t understand them and you’re getting more and more frustrated, and it’s just terribly stressful.

Kenzie has been violent and whiny these last couple of days. Violent with Carter especially. I feel like I’m always telling him to stop hitting or, “Don’t you punch your brother!!” and then when he gets in trouble, his voice goes to this girly pitch and he whines at you, and if you get upset at him for whining, he starts crying. It seems like we’re discovering that Kaeidyn, Kenzie and Keirnan are becoming more and more like their father everyday!

Carter’s got a front tooth breaking through, plus he’s been sick, so he’s been a grumpy guy these last couple of days. Mostly at night it seems. During the day we can still get him to laugh and smile, but once night hits all he wants to do is cuddle and eat. He’s so squeaky right now thanks to his cold, and it reminds me so much of the first couple of days in the hospital after he was born, and every time he’d cry, he’d squeak. It’s a constant reminder that he’s growing up so fast!

I’ve thrown out another couple of resumes, and so far no response back. But I don’t expect to hear anything for at least two weeks. I’m hoping a job isn’t going to kill my body. I can’t even regularly take showers because it’s too much for my knees to bare, imagine standing on my feet for eight hours!!  But I think that determination will see me through.

Well I guess that’s all for now. For those of you who haven’t yet, you can keep updated on all the blogs and sites that I write and maintain at The Rantings Network Headquarters. Also follow me on Twitter!

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This week has been the longest week of my life. After two or three days of cleaning with Mama T, which didn’t even get done…, I pretty much spent the next two or three days trying to avoid dealing with absolutely anything.

My room and the kids’ sleeping room got nice and clean, even got the carpets shampooed. Even though Mama T went to the laundromat with stuff, I’m still doing loads that weren’t taken. I think I’ve done four in the last two days (stupid dryer…), and I’ve probably got at least ten left to go. That’s even after sorting through all the dirty clothes and just throwing out anything we weren’t keeping.

Today I got a little bit more cleaning done. I can’t wait until the kitchen is clean, I think I’ll be quite please when that happens. Don’t know when it’s going to happen, but it’s got to. I’ve pretty much kissed the concept of keeping my entire house clean goodbye, so for now I’ll just be happy with what I can get.

The weather has been pretty nice around here lately. It’s always a good time of year for me when the weather is nice. Because then the older kids spend most of the day outside. While that means that I’m getting up more often (to check on them), and listening to more whining (as they fight over the bike and the car), it’s a heck of alot quieter on the interior of the house!

Kaeidyn had yet another birthday party to go to today. That’s the third one this year! This time was the movie theater. Again, I didn’t get to take her, but luckily my aunt had no problem getting her there and back. I love that she’s a girly girl who likes to put make up on and play dress up and get her hair done. It forces me to be a little bit more girly.

Kenzie has been a brat these last couple of days. He’s got so much energy and he still doesn’t grasp the limitations of his strength. Today, he had to be completely grounded off of being anywhere near Carter because everytime he’d go near him, Carter would end up getting hurt. He comes to give me a kiss goodnight and bashes his head off my chin. He just rushes about so much, that it’s like he’s not paying attention to anything.

Keirnan seems like he’s been nothing but tears these last couple of days. He always seems to be whining about something. Someone took his toy, it’s too cold, it’s too hot, he’s bored. We had a nice long cuddle at the computer today after Kaeidyn left for her party, he was incredibly upset.

He’s been working hard on the talking thing. If you talk to someone else, like if you’re giving Kenzie heck, he’ll copy every word you say. The only problem is, all those words sound exactly the same. It just sounds like he’s repeating the same word over and over.

Carter, the little devil, is officially on the move, all the time. We can’t get him to stay still if our lives depended on it. He pulls himself up on the furniture with ease, he’s crawling like a crazy fiend, he’s even starting to sit by himself. I’m pretty sure he’s officially saying “Mama” too, it sure sounds like it.

I wish that I would’ve had what I have with him with the other kids. He’ll be in shambles, crying his heart out, and I’ll walk in the room and he hears my voice, and immediately his face lights up – and so does mine. He’s constantly wanting to cuddle me and be held by me, and I’m not even breastfeeding all the time anymore.

I feel differently about him as a baby than I did about the other kids as babies. Yes, I loved them all to death as babies. But I was so in that depressed state, that I never really enjoyed them as babies. I didn’t play with them alot as babies, I didn’t hold them all the time. With Carter, I’m just in this mental state where I can be receptive to him and be giving to him. At least I have that with the older kids now, I just keep thinking I wish I would’ve had it then.

This last week has been trying on my entire being, especially physically and emotionally. I think I have reached over the five mark on the pain scale, ten being the highest. It seems like everyday I discover a new muscle, with it’s aches and pains right behind it. Today, it feels like the muscle that’s used to pull my shoulder blades together, is literally throbbing. When I woke up this morning, and right up until it got dark, it was my feet and ankles. Yesterday, it was all in my knees.

Then to make all matters worse, I’m still freaking bleeding. It’s been six months since I had Carter, and I’ve had maybe a total now of ten days without bleeding, but other than that, bleeding. It seriously can’t be healthy to bleed for six months!!! I need to see my doctor about it, but I fear that it will all be chalked up to the depo, and then I’ll be taken off of that and forced to go to some other method. And so far, this method is working out really well for me.

I’m not one of those people who easily remembers to take a pill everyday. I’ve never used a tampon, so the idea of the Nuva-Ring scares the heck out of me. I’ve been having sex without a condom, since I started having sex, and it doesn’t make any sense to me whatsoever to go back to it, when I’m only having sex with the father of my baby! I think before I think about it too much, I should just call my doctor tomorrow.

Tomorrow… It’s going to be a busy day. I’ve gotta walk Kaeidyn to school in the morning (YAY for Alfie working…), then I absolutely need to call H&R Block about getting my taxes done – which I’m hoping they’ll be able to do even though I don’t have ID (which I need to do something about sometime soon), I need to call a couple other places and hopefully go cash a check tomorrow.

It’s also Kenzie’s birthday tomorrow! He officially turns the big 4. We’ve sort of planned having a party for him on Saturday, though I don’t know exactly what we’re doing or where or what time or who’s coming. All details to figure out this week. It’s hard to believe that Kenzie’s been around for four years, he still seems so young. I’m totally recounting the story of his birth to him tomorrow. “It was a bright, sunny day. Don’t worry, at the end of this story there is great pain and gushes of blood…”

These last couple of days have been full of emotions for me. From stressed to happy, and annoyed to giddy. The kids have all been pretty rotten these last couple of days. Kaeidyn’s been whiny and bossy, and learning too much, too young. And I never thought I’d be one of those parents who ever said that.

But when Kaeidyn came in from playing outside today, telling me about a kid right around her age, telling her that they had a girlfriend that they slept with and made out with (making out for Kaeidyn is sex), I changed my mind completely. I don’t have an issue talking to her about sex at all, but I don’t like other people talking to her about sex. I don’t like that I wasn’t around to explain it to her or anything. And of course, when she brought it up, I was just so taken aback by the fact that a kid her age was bragging about making out with another kid her age, that I didn’t even respond at first. I just kind of sat there with my mouth open.

She got her hair curled last night, and she went to school with ringlets. Man, does my kid ever look cute with curly hair. I wish I could make it like that forever. It’s going to be interesting to see what it looks like tomorrow. Even though she’s got my hair, she holds a curl way better than I do…

She’s been repeating the beginning of her sentences alot lately. Just over and over again, she’ll say the same four or five words, and then after a few times of saying it, she finally blurts out the rest of the sentence. She sounds alot like Goober did when he was younger. Alfie’s convinced that she only does it around us, because he’s never heard her do it outside of the house. I think at the next parent/teacher conference, I’m gonna ask if the speech therapist has noticed anything.

We’ve finally reached a successful note with the formula, so far. It was being so hard, and now it just suddenly seems easy. For some reason, he won’t take the bottle from The Boyfriend as long as I’m around. The best part is, is that he’s already holding the bottle. I still breastfeed him at night and a few times during the day. But I’ve been trying increasing the amount of formula he’s having everyday.

The first couple of days of more than 2 oz. of formula, he was puking it up every single time he was fed. Now though, we’ve had almost two days of no puking. It doesn’t seem to really be helping his sleeping that much, but it’s definitely nice for me. We’ve made a new discovery with him too. He likes to sleep with a blanket covering his face. The other day, he got underneath of the blanket, and fell asleep. Now, he almost insists on it. If it’s not a blanket, it’s his arm over his eyes.

He’s been moving alot too. You can’t leave him alone for any length of time, because he’s moving so much. We had to buy a baby gate to make sure he doesn’t crawl down the stairs. He keeps pulling himself up on the furniture, and today he finally figured out how to get down from the standing at the furniture position without hurting himself. He is growing up way too fast.

The Boyfriend got me to print up pictures of Carter for him for work tonight. He does it every couple of months. Of course, we haven’t been able to get new pictures because my camera broke, but he took a bunch of old ones. It’s just amazing to me that at one time, he was just a little baby, and now…

Keirnan and Kenzie have been, well, Keirnan and Kenzie. They’ve been noisy, rough and whiny. Keirnan’s having such a hard time with the talking, and I still seem to be the only one who understands him. He also seems to be having a hard time comprehending simple instructions, like today when they were all getting ready to go outside, he was told to grab a pair of socks and his shoes. Well, he went and grabbed his jacket instead. After much pointing and some repeating, probably ten minutes passed and he finally grabbed socks and A shoe.

Kenzie has been trying to help out with Carter constantly, from moving him back to the blanket to holding his bottle. Problem is, Kenzie still hasn’t really gotten control of his strength and doesn’t really know his limitations. Without meaning to, he’s been pretty rough these last couple of days. I feel like I’m constantly saying to him, “Be gentle”, and it feels like he’s just not getting it.

The Boyfriend goes down to part-time starting Monday. There is a big part of me that is filled with this great joy knowing that he’s gonna be around more often. Not only to help out with the handful of kids, but also to keep me company. But there’s another part of me that is worried as hell.

If we were smarter with our money, I wouldn’t be so concerned. But we’re not very smart with our money. As it is, with him working full-time, I feel like we’re barely scraping by month to month. I feel like, financially, this couldn’t have come at a worse time. As long as, if it does get too rough financially, we’re both prepared to do something about it, I think it’ll be okay. But I’ve been stressed about it. He’s just so excited to get to be with Carter more often, that he’s not to the point of stressing about it yet.

I’m hoping, with him having more days off, and being around more often, we might actually get this house sort of clean. It seems like everyday, I make this list and I say, “I’m gonna clean this and that”, and everyday, it never happens. Today I started to clean the living room, by organizing the entertainment stand (which normally gives me a boost of energy for cleaning), but then I screwed up on the alphabetical organization, and that was the end of my cleaning… At least I’ve been getting some laundry done.

So again, I failed NaBloPoMo. A whole three days into it, and at first it wasn’t completely my fault. My timezone in WordPress wasn’t right, so when I posted at 11 something one night, it didn’t show up until after midnight. I’ve fixed the timezone issue.

Then I’ve had two days of complete and utter soreness, and the last thing I’ve wanted to do is sit in front of the computer. It’s absolutely horrible. I haven’t done anything really except for sitting on the couch. My entire body feels swollen (even though it’s not), and every bone feels brittle and like it’s on the verge of breaking. I feel weak and heavy and fragile… This kind of soreness isn’t that bad when it’s isolated to one area, but when it expands to your entire body, it’s intense and ridiculous. I’m completely sick of it.

I had written up a post a couple days ago of the exact same title (those of you following me on Twitter, might have followed a blank link…), and for some reason after I published it, the entire post disappeared. I wasn’t in the mood to write it up again then, so here’s my attempt…

The kids are all doing pretty wonderfully. Finally went for a nap today (after almost an entire week of planning everyday for a nap). Today was one of those days when a nap seemed completely out of the question, but somehow we managed to squeeze one in and it was wonderful. The best three hours I’ve had in awhile. The kids, even though they claimed they weren’t tired and instead wanted to just sit quietly in their room, actually fell asleep before I even tucked Carter and I in.

This morning, Alfie’s Mom and Step-Dad came and picked the kids up and took them shopping. They hadn’t seem them since Christmas, so it was a nice thing for them and they were so excited. Keirnan got the world’s most annoying bunny toy. You push a button, the bunny pops up and the thing (as loud as it can) goes, “Boing, Boing”. Kaeidyn got new earrings, so now she’s got five different pairs to pick from. So far, she’s liking the blue flowers The Boyfriend got her best. Kenzie got a Ben 10 game for the Wii, the first thing he did when he got home was play it, and now he’s been asking ever since.

That’s two days in a row that The Boyfriend and I have gotten a big chunk of time away from the older kids. Yesterday we had to go pick up a barbecue, because we’re both getting sick of not being able to cook anything thanks to the stupid load limiter. So Kenzie and Keirnan stayed with Alfie, and Kaeidyn and Carter went over to Mama T’s. The Boyfriend and I went shopping and it was beautiful.

Even though we were in the loudness of our local Wal-Mart, it was so nice and quiet. I seriously never realized how easy it is to take silence for granted. Because now, when it does happen, it is seriously the most comforting and relaxing thing I’ve ever experienced. And when I don’t have it, I wish that I did…

It was nice to finally get away from Carter for longer than five or ten minutes. He’s been such a mama suck lately, and of course, I’ve been letting him. So I imagine it’s going to get worse. None of the other kids were like this at all. I could leave them and they hardly noticed. They didn’t like to be held or cuddled that much, and when they did, it was normally by someone else. So I’ve never experienced this whole, “I want my Mommy all the time” thing. It’s truly extremely exhausting.

Waking up to Carter lately has been the most fun and annoying thing in the world. He’s gotten where he likes to pull himself up on everything. And I mean absolutely anything. Most days, I’ll wake up to him trying to stand by using my face as his support, and then him sucking on my hair. I think he’s seriously going to be walking before he’s sitting. He pulls himself up on the ottoman, he pulls himself up on the couch, the arm of the couch, legs. He loves to be standing. Though, do you think we could get him to sit by himself? Not a chance…

Keirnan is working really hard on picking up this whole talking thing. At least once a day, Kaeidyn starts saying words and will make him repeat after her. I’ve been trying the same thing. I can make out what he’s saying almost everytime he talks, but I think that’s just because I’m his Mom and not because he’s actually making any sense, because I seem to be the only one picking it up. He seems to only say the starting syllable in a word, and sentence structure is beyond him at this point.

Kaeidyn has been doing nothing but bugging me to put on make-up. Even after she’s just put some on, she’s asking to put more on. She’s still wearing make-up from before we went out yesterday, and the make-up that she put on at Mama T’s (she did both their make-up, and has been going off all day asking if Grandma’s called yet to get her hair fixed!), and she’s still asking if she can have some on. She’s been rhyming up a storm these last couple of days too. Mostly with made up words, but rhyming nonetheless.

Kenzie hasn’t been doing too much besides wanting to play his games.  The good thing about the whole game playing thing, is he almost never wants to play alone anymore. He’s always asking people to play games with him. At Kaeidyn’s parent/teacher conference, since she’s in speech therapy, the teacher offered us an application to The Bright Beginnings program, which is a pre-kindergarten program for kids with special needs. She figured since Kaeidyn had speech problems, Kenzie might too.

I was going through the application the other day and I don’t think Kenzie qualifies at all. He already talks better than Kaeidyn, in his own right. Kaeidyn seems to understand bigger concepts than he does, but Kenzie puts the ‘s’ where it’s supposed to be in words. I was sitting on the couch reading with them the other day, which doesn’t happen nearly as often as I would like, and Kenzie seemed to understand his colors really well and his numbers too. So I don’t think I’ll be trying to get him into The Bright Beginnings Program, maybe Keirnan when he turns three or four though.

I’ve been craving a different look for my dull, plain and ridiculously shapeless hair. So when we went and got the barbecue yesterday, we picked me up some hair rollers, so hopefully I’ll be able to get some ringlets going, as soon as I get the energy to actually put them in my hair. I’ve been buying so many girly products lately, that you’d actually believe that I was a girl… It’s different to say the least.

Well, it’s officially time for me to decide what we’re going to barbecue tonight. It’s either gonna be pork or chicken. Gotta get The Boyfriend to spark it up because I’m afraid of propane 😉 Yay for the load limiter and barbecuing when it feels like winter outside.

Tomorrow’s gonna be an exciting day, because Goober gets to come home for a couple hours. We’re all going over to Mama T’s for a visit and it’s going to be good, I hope. I hope the stress of the visit (and the lack of the institution – I know that was really hard for me) isn’t too much for him and he’s fine when he goes back. The kids are really excited to see him too.

I wish that Carter would stop crying. I wish that he’d let me put him down. I feel permanently attached to him today, except for earlier when he was happy playing on floor. From that, his knees are all red and almost look like he’s starting to get rug burn.

We had one successful feeding with the formula, and now he’s back to refusing to take it. He seems to be getting distracted from feeding altogether and only really takes well to my breast now when I’m laying down. And I can’t, nor do I want to, lay down all the time!

All the kids have been testing my annoyance levels all day today. Kaeidyn’s been hungry literally all day, I think it’s time for another growth spurt. After cereal this morning, within half an hour she was asking for a snack. Even after she got her snack, she kept asking for more food. Lunch came around, and she downed her lunch and then asked for a snack immediately after. She had two snacks before dinner, mowed down on dinner and is now having yet another snack before bed.

They all seem to be extremely whiny lately too. Especially the boys. I feel bad saying it, but honestly Kenzie’s voice right now is just about the most annoying thing ever. Even when he’s happy, he has a piercing, whiny twang to his voice that automatically causes my temples to pulse. It doesn’t help that he is completely unaware of the volume of his whiny twang, so it seems like every time he opens his mouth, he’s being told to quiet down.

Keirnan’s been crying constantly and seems to cause himself at least two wounds a day. I don’t know if it’s clumsiness as much as it is carelessness. He hits his head off things, even though he ducks when he thinks it’s going to hit him in the head. Somehow manages to hit the table, the counter and the doorknobs constantly. Instead of walking over or picking up a toy, he’ll just step right on it. Which results in a bout of relentless tears and his intense squealing which just about drives me over the edge every time he does it.

I’ve been doing things to try to squander the whininess as much possible, like I used to be able to do. For instance, I let them play outside constantly. Usually when they get fresh air, they become exhausted and pretty much quiet. Now though, it almost seems to make them grumpier. Or giving them a drink. Usually after they’ve had a drink, they don’t whine as much. They’ll sit quietly and drink their drink. Lately, they get a drink and then they all seem to get out of control.

I think that’s the biggest reason why it’s reached this point of overwhelming annoyance. Everything about life right now is completely out of control. The condition of my house is out of control, my finances are out of control, the kids are out of control, the list goes on and on….

I finally and unexpectedly vacuumed the living room, which has been on my to do list for way too long. I was working away on the computer and then I got up to grab a piece of paper that Kaeidyn had left on the ground from Carter, and next thing you know, I’m tidying the floor and vacuuming it. Even though you can hardly tell now, but it’s the thought that counts.

Talked to my landlord today, and this load limiter thing is just a ridiculous thing. Now my landlord wants me to call them back and if they say it’s his responsibility again, he’s gonna call and deal with it, so that I end up having to pay the last eight months of arrears. The thing that pisses me off about it, isn’t that I have to pay that money. It’s that I wish I would’ve known that something was up with my power and I don’t know whose fault it actually was, the providers or the landlords. Plus it pisses me off, because eight months of arrears is not going to come cheap, and right now money is so tight that it will probably take me another eight months just to pay the arrears. And then I’ll have eight more months of arrears to start paying and I’ll be stuck in a horrible and vicious circle.

The Boyfriend has been looking into going down to part-time. Financially speaking, it’s completely inconvenient and couldn’t have possibly come at a worse time. But it’s also killing him in all sorts of ways to continue on like this. If it weren’t graveyard and if he could get some proper sleep, it wouldn’t be that bad. Unfortunately, it’s just not working out and when almost everyday he’s talking about hating his job, how could I possibly not support him on something that could change his physical, mental and emotional status – and for the better.

And if he goes down to part-time, then I can possibly start a part-time job. That would make me ecstatic. I’ve been craving going back to work for years, and it seems the longer I don’t work, the more I want to. Obviously I couldn’t work for long hours or anything, because Carter’s only willing to do rice cereal once a day. But if I could work it around his feedings, maybe during his afternoon nap, I could get away with anywhere from 2 -4 hours of work a couple of times a week.

This morning, I woke up and got ready to take Kaeidyn to school.  I had completely forgotten that it was St. Patrick’s Day and that she was supposed to wear green to school today. Fortunately, I had made her wear her camo pants today (which she claims are boy pants, but I don’t care, because she looks adorable in them ;)), which had green in them.

So then I walk her into her classroom, like I do every Wednesday (the only day of the week that I’m in charge of taking her to and from school), and all the shoes on the indoor shoe shelf have all been moved to different spots, which just confused the heck out of her. Then she walked further into her class.

Well apparently, a leprechaun came into the room and trashed it. Markers were flung across the room, chairs at the tables were flipped upside down. This, of course, made Kaeidyn incredibly excited. For the rest of the day, when anything moved from one position to another, it was because of the leprechaun.

It was a gorgeous day here today. Warm enough that I comfortably went outside with a sweater, which is saying alot, being that I’m normally the one whose always cold, even when everyone else is complaining they’re hot. I’ve been going through summer withdrawal mighty hard after the awesome summer we had last year, so immediately I had an urge to go for a walk.

For the first time, in what’s felt like forever, Kaeidyn, Kenzie, Keirnan, Carter, The Boyfriend and I all went to the part. It’s been along time since we’ve been able to leave the house, all at one time, all together (Man, I hope we get a bigger vehicle really soon!). We all went over to Kaeidyn’s school to play at the park, which we’ve been promising her we were going to do forever.

We didn’t stay too long, because the wind picked up about 15 minutes after we left the house, and Carter was only in the Snugli, so it was pretty chilly for him after awhile. I was surprised at how easily all the kids were to get off the park. I told them, “One more time down the slide”, so they each took their turn, and we walked home.

Kaeidyn noticed a messy yard, and tried convincing us all the way home that it was the leprechauns. Then when we got home, the kids got to play outside for quite awhile. Keirnan was the first to come in, complaining of cold hands. I guess that’s what he gets for  playing in the puddles. Kenzie was the next one in. I think he just wanted to take his pants off.

We had him doing so good, wearing underwear or pants. Now though, it’s almost impossible. He’s also constantly grabbing at himself, like it’s a newly discovered toy. I don’t want to scare him away from touching himself, so we tell him to go downstairs to his bedroom or the bathroom to play with himself, because that’s just what you do. He’ll normally get upset when he’s told this, and I’m not sure why.

Kaeidyn stayed outside the longest, because she’s met a couple kids on the street that she likes. I’m personally, not fond of many of the kids on our street. We had the cops come to talk to all the kids that were out on the street, not paying attention to oncoming cars. Today, some little kid was swinging a stick around in the middle of the street trying to smash snow piles, and a van came up behind him and was waiting forever, even after honking, for him to move out of the street. And a bunch of the kids are like that.

I’ve had the kids from this street dig holes in my yard, draw on my house, and throw pine cones at the car. And frankly, I’m getting quite sick of it. The good thing though, is that my kids know to stay in the yard. They get one warning after stepping one foot off the sidewalk in front of the house.

Keirnan was talking up a storm today on our walk, asking questions, telling us what he was doing. He saw a school bus and started yelling out bus clear as day. As a mom, I’m always wanting my kids to grow up and become independent. With Keirnan, I’m always like, “I wish he would hurry up and talk already”, with Carter, “I can’t wait until he starts crawling”. Kaeidyn is was walking and Kenzie it was talking to (because he had the annoying “eh, eh” thing that Keirnan’s just starting to get out of). Then it happens, and I’m all like, “Oh, my babies are growing up so fast. Why can’t they just be babies again?” I guess it’s just another one of those vicious circles.

I’ve spent the last two days pretty much curled up on the couch watching TV, because I’ve been in an incredible amount of pain. The pharmacist warned me that the pills I’m on could cause me to have some stomach upset. The last two days, all my stomach upset has been right underneath of my ribs, much like the pain I had when I passed gallstones (or at least, that’s the best the doctor’s could figure), just much milder. Then, to top that all off, my knees, back and neck are all hurting as bad as they did when I was pregnant with Carter. I wanna blame it on the meds…

Well, Carter’s awake, so I better go and feed him. I think I caught up on everything I had planned to 😉

Today, Carter and I had a doctor’s appointment. It went pretty well. Carter is doing great, though he dropped from being in the 80th percentile in his weight, down to the 25th percentile. I knew he wasn’t gaining much from my breast milk alone.

At first I was disappointed to hear it, especially being that I think he feels ridiculously heavy. I have a hard time holding him for the length of a breastfeeding, because I think he’s so heavy. But since his last appointment at about 2 months, he’s only gained 2 lbs. So the doctor suggested we try out some solids and maybe start supplementing with formula. I was disappointed, but then I thought about the fact that I’ve been breastfeeding for five months, and only breastfeeding. The only other kid I breastfed for any length of time was Kenzie and that was just a little over a month.

I got my depo prescription filled, and now have to go get that injected. Complained about the pain in my knee, which keeps coming and going. When I was pregnant, it hurt all the time. Now, it goes in and out of hurting. So I got an x-ray, though it showed nothing, so I got an oral and topical anti-inflammatory. Then I mentioned the sketchiness at night, and was given some Ativan.

I know I’ve heard about Ativan, though I can’t remember much about it. The doctor knows that I’m breastfeeding, though the warning says not to use it while you’re breastfeeding. So before I start taking that one, I’ll be calling my local pharmacist. I’ve been “seeing” the same pharmacist (in a very informal manner) since I moved here. He’s a great pharmacist. He describes each medication in detail, lists off commonly reported side effects, and has the answers to my sometimes obvious answered questions. I just realized, that I don’t even know his name… I just know he’s the pharmacist at Wal-Mart 😉

The other day, we whipped out the electric razor, and now Keirnan has no hair (yes, we even got rid of his little rat tail that he’s had since birth!), Kenzie has much shorter hair, though his needs a touch up because he kept jumping all over the place. And Kaeidyn was jealous that the boys got their hair cut with the razor, so I cut her bangs with it. They all look so different when they get their hair cut. Kenzie especially. He looks much more skinny with less hair on his head 😉

Keirnan said his first full and very clear sentence today. “What’s this movie?” was the question he blurted out at Alfie. I couldn’t believe how clear it was. I believe completely that Keirnan can talk, he just doesn’t want to. He knows if he doesn’t, his sister or brother will step in and talk for him. The Boyfriend says he was the same way growing up. And that makes me think that I applaud any woman in the entire world, who raises boys without a man around. Because I would be completely lost!

Kenzie has been playing less and less games it seems. And it almost seems like it’s happened completely naturally. He doesn’t like being secluded away from everyone so much. If I fall asleep on the couch while Kaeidyn’s at school, then he’ll play the Wii. But other than that, he asks about them still, but hardly ever plays them. It’s been really good.

I’ve been feeling overwhelmed these last couple of days, though still in really good spirits. The messes in the house keep piling up and seem harder and harder to maintain (especially with how tired I’ve been these last couple of days), the kids seem to be getting louder and louder (especially Carter who seems to only cry and eat and sleep!) and even though I’m hardly doing anything, by the end of the day I feel tired and sore and stressed about the day to come.

I was also disappointed today at the doctor’s, when I stepped upon the scale and it creeped past the 136 lbs I was the last time I weighed myself. I won’t tell you where it’s at, because I’m still in denial, but I will tell you that I’m absolutely not happy with it. I need to start doing more cardio and ab workouts and get rid of my baby pooch…