Posts Tagged ‘Mama T’

I’m so happy it’s a sunny day today. Yesterday was so cold, and the house was so cold (until we turned the oven on…), and today has the potential of being a really nice day. I might even get to kick the kids outside for a bit ūüėČ

So Kaeidyn got her first real slumber party the other night, after we went to see some of The Boyfriend’s family, on a cold and dreary, windy day in the park. Kaeidyn calls me when we’re getting ready to go pick her up, asking if she gets to come home soon. Then when I say yes, she bursts out into tears, “But I don’t want to come home now. I want to spend another night!” She came home…

My housework is getting out of control again, and it sucks because I feel like it wasn’t that long ago that Mama T was here helping out. Laziness, procrastination and soreness throughout my body are being huge¬†hindrances¬†in getting anything done. I think it also has something to do with The Boyfriend being home so often. When he’s around and awake (which happens more and more), I want to spend those moments with him – or at least close to him.

It’s been nice having him around so much. Even though we’ve been going through a little bit of a rough patch, for a whole bunch of reasons (mostly very petty reasons), it’s nice seeing him alot everyday and spending time with him and most importantly sleeping next to him. The only thing that sucks about it at all is that on his days off, he pushes his sleeping limit. He’ll try to stay up for almost the entire three days off, and spends most of it exhausted because of it (and normally the first two days off).

Went to Kaeidyn’s year-end review the other day. She’s doing amazing, and is on the verge of reading, so that’s really exciting. The school wants us to get her hearing checked because she’s still leaving off the “sh” at the end of words. She seems to be okay when she’s copying a person, but in just normal conversation, she’s constantly leaving it out.

I love that I’m the type of parent I always wanted to be when it comes to her year-end reviews. I tear up when I look at her scrapbook and see how much she’s improved. I ask tons of questions when we’re at them, checking to make sure she’s doing good. I’m just hoping one of these days (probably when she’s not only going for half a day), I’ll be one of those parents who gets involved in her schooling more, involved in the school more.

Keirnan’s appointment for getting his teeth pulled is coming up. It’s surprising to me that he hasn’t had more problems with the teeth. Before we went to the dentist, it seemed like every month or two he was getting infections and needing antibiotics. This last little while has been really good. He hasn’t complained about them at all, and only now is he starting to show signs of maybe getting an infection. Luckily, it’s only a few more weeks until they will be out and not causing him a problem.

Carter, my dear, sweet Carter. He has been motoring everywhere. We can’t look away from him for longer than a second before he’s half way across the room. He’s decided he likes to sit at the top of the stairs and yell down them (it echoes quite nicely), so we are often chasing him back to the living room. I don’t understand why we don’t use the safety gate more, other than the fact that I still haven’t even tried to learn how to use it.

Kenzie has been loud, really loud. And constantly hyper. He seems to have energy seeping from every pore in his body and can more often than not be found running about the house, screaming something. Followed, of course, by everyone else in the house going, “Quiet down, Kenzie!”, to which Keirnan normally responds, “No”, his new favorite word.

My body has been giving me all sorts of problems lately. I went for my pelvic ultrasound, and they said everything looked normal and the best they could figure is that it’s the depo causing it. My doctor wants me to start taking the shots every two months instead of every three. I don’t want to go off the depo though, this is the longest I’ve ever been on birth control without missing a day or forgetting to take my pills for a week or two. Even though there’s all these other things that I hate about it, at least it’s keeping me from getting pregnant. I just want to stop bleeding.

My entire body has been filled with pain these last couple of days. From things feeling like their swelling, to joints being stiff, and cramping all up and down my back, my pain is seriously exhausting. My knees and ankles have been really bad these past couple of days. I hate that I’m still so young, but feel so old. I even walk like an old lady.

I’ve been thinking about starting a serious workout regime, especially being that since I haven’t gotten to sleep in past ten in a really long time, it’s been easier and easier for me to wake up early. This morning, I was awake before the kids! I just want to get rid of my baby pooch (which looks like I’m 3 months pregnant on bad days!), and feel comfortable in this skin, because lately, I really really don’t. The only problem (along with almost all the problems in my life) is that I have absolutely no routine of the day. Or at least a very crappy routine.

The Boyfriend and I have been talking about getting some sort of routine in place. Especially where finances are concerned. I hate that we sit around talking about all this stuff, and then never do it. We need to become the kind of people who get up off our butts and just do things. Not the impulsive things we do. I mean, when we say we’re going to create a budget and stick to it, we need to become the type of people who will. Or when we say we’re gonna start working out, that we do.

Well, I think now I’m going to go browse through my local paper and see what jobs I might be able to apply online to (since I haven’t heard back from any of the previous places I applied at). I’m still not taking it very seriously, as I still have another 5 months of maternity leave left. But man, am I desperate to get out of the house more!

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So I’ve been incredibly lazy these last couple of days, and yet not so lazy all at the same time. I haven’t gotten any cleaning done around the house, I keep making The Boyfriend walk Kaeidyn to school, and I’ve been making him do the laundry and the cooking. He’s been wonderful and just picks up all the slack and hardly complains about it at all.

I’ve been feeling very weak and tired and sore lately. I got out of bed today and all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. I was trying so hard to stay awake on the couch, but I kept dozing off. Again, The Boyfriend was a sweetheart and let me go back to sleep until I had to go pick Kaeidyn up from school.

Then Mama T came over, and the kids suckered her in to letting us go over there. Had a super delicious barbecued pork supper with corn on the cob. It really is my most favorite vegetable in the world. Mama T had four cobs, and a can of corn. The cobs were meant for us adults, but the kids weren’t having that and shared with Mama T and Chef, and then devoured what wasn’t finished on mine and The Boyfriend’s.

Yesterday or maybe the day before, we were convinced Carter had chicken pox. He woke up and his entire chest and back and up his neck was covered in these little red dots. Had them in his armpits, diaper line, everywhere but his legs and arms. Then we went to sleep and when we woke up they were almost gone, but by the afternoon they were back with a vengeance and had multiplied.

Today, you can hardly tell at all. He has a cold, but that’s it. We’re thinking it might be a bit of heat rash mixed with the crawling on the carpet. It seems to get worse when it’s warmer in the house. I’ve made a doctor’s appointment for tomorrow and we’re getting that and his mark on his foot. He’s had it since we brought him home from the hospital, and we’re chalking it up to a birth mark. But it’s gotten darker and I just want to get it checked out, being that it hasn’t been there since he was born.

Kaeidyn’s year-end review is coming up in a couple weeks. I’m excited to see how much she’s improved. I don’t know how the whole transition from Kindergarten to Grade 1 goes, so we’ll be discussing that too. The Boyfriend and I have been in charge of walking her to school everyday this week, though I think only once did I take her to school. She even prefers The Boyfriend walking her to school, and most days when I go pick her up from school, she sees me and excitedly yells, “Mommy” and then gives me a¬†quizzical¬†look and says, “Why couldn’t The Boyfriend come pick me up?”.

Keirnan officially has more than one word in his vocabulary. It’s still mostly just understanding him through pointing. “Airplane” and “Bicycle” are now his two favorite words, and as we’re driving or walking or sitting in the house, if he sees or hears these things, he screams the word out with delight. I hate this point in the talking game, because it’s the most frustrating part. They know what they want, and they’re trying to say it, and you’re trying to understand but you can’t, and they’re saying it over and over and getting more and more frustrated by the fact that you can’t understand them and you’re getting more and more frustrated, and it’s just terribly stressful.

Kenzie has been violent and whiny these last couple of days. Violent with Carter especially. I feel like I’m always telling him to stop hitting or, “Don’t you punch your brother!!” and then when he gets in trouble, his voice goes to this girly pitch and he whines at you, and if you get upset at him for whining, he starts crying. It seems like we’re discovering that Kaeidyn, Kenzie and Keirnan are becoming more and more like their father everyday!

Carter’s got a front tooth breaking through, plus he’s been sick, so he’s been a grumpy guy these last couple of days. Mostly at night it seems. During the day we can still get him to laugh and smile, but once night hits all he wants to do is cuddle and eat. He’s so squeaky right now thanks to his cold, and it reminds me so much of the first couple of days in the hospital after he was born, and every time he’d cry, he’d squeak. It’s a constant reminder that he’s growing up so fast!

I’ve thrown out another couple of resumes, and so far no response back. But I don’t expect to hear anything for at least two weeks. I’m hoping a job isn’t going to kill my body. I can’t even regularly take showers because it’s too much for my knees to bare, imagine standing on my feet for eight hours!! ¬†But I think that determination will see me through.

Well I guess that’s all for now. For those of you who haven’t yet, you can keep updated on all the blogs and sites that I write and maintain at The Rantings Network Headquarters. Also follow me on Twitter!

This week has been the longest week of my life. After two or three days of cleaning with Mama T, which didn’t even get done…, I pretty much spent the next two or three days trying to avoid dealing with absolutely anything.

My room and the kids’ sleeping room got nice and clean, even got the carpets shampooed. Even though Mama T went to the laundromat with stuff, I’m still doing loads that weren’t taken. I think I’ve done four in the last two days (stupid dryer…), and I’ve probably got at least ten left to go. That’s even after sorting through all the dirty clothes and just throwing out anything we weren’t keeping.

Today I got a little bit more cleaning done. I can’t wait until the kitchen is clean, I think I’ll be quite please when that happens. Don’t know when it’s going to happen, but it’s got to. I’ve pretty much kissed the concept of keeping my entire house clean goodbye, so for now I’ll just be happy with what I can get.

The weather has been pretty nice around here lately. It’s always a good time of year for me when the weather is nice. Because then the older kids spend most of the day outside. While that means that I’m getting up more often (to check on them), and listening to more whining (as they fight over the bike and the car), it’s a heck of alot quieter on the interior of the house!

Kaeidyn had yet another birthday party to go to today. That’s the third one this year! This time was the movie theater. Again, I didn’t get to take her, but luckily my aunt had no problem getting her there and back. I love that she’s a girly girl who likes to put make up on and play dress up and get her hair done. It forces me to be a little bit more girly.

Kenzie has been a brat these last couple of days. He’s got so much energy and he still doesn’t grasp the limitations of his strength. Today, he had to be completely grounded off of being anywhere near Carter because everytime he’d go near him, Carter would end up getting hurt. He comes to give me a kiss goodnight and bashes his head off my chin. He just rushes about so much, that it’s like he’s not paying attention to anything.

Keirnan seems like he’s been nothing but tears these last couple of days. He always seems to be whining about something. Someone took his toy, it’s too cold, it’s too hot, he’s bored. We had a nice long cuddle at the computer today after Kaeidyn left for her party, he was incredibly upset.

He’s been working hard on the talking thing. If you talk to someone else, like if you’re giving Kenzie heck, he’ll copy every word you say. The only problem is, all those words sound exactly the same. It just sounds like he’s repeating the same word over and over.

Carter, the little devil, is officially on the move, all the time. We can’t get him to stay still if our lives depended on it. He pulls himself up on the furniture with ease, he’s crawling like a crazy fiend, he’s even starting to sit by himself. I’m pretty sure he’s officially saying “Mama” too, it sure sounds like it.

I wish that I would’ve had what I have with him with the other kids. He’ll be in shambles, crying his heart out, and I’ll walk in the room and he hears my voice, and immediately his face lights up – and so does mine. He’s constantly wanting to cuddle me and be held by me, and I’m not even breastfeeding all the time anymore.

I feel differently about him as a baby than I did about the other kids as babies. Yes, I loved them all to death as babies. But I was so in that depressed state, that I never really enjoyed them as babies. I didn’t play with them alot as babies, I didn’t hold them all the time. With Carter, I’m just in this mental state where I can be receptive to him and be giving to him. At least I have that with the older kids now, I just keep thinking I wish I would’ve had it then.

This last week has been trying on my entire being, especially physically and emotionally. I think I have reached over the five mark on the pain scale, ten being the highest. It seems like everyday I discover a new muscle, with it’s aches and pains right behind it. Today, it feels like the muscle that’s used to pull my shoulder blades together, is literally throbbing. When I woke up this morning, and right up until it got dark, it was my feet and ankles. Yesterday, it was all in my knees.

Then to make all matters worse, I’m still freaking bleeding. It’s been six months since I had Carter, and I’ve had maybe a total now of ten days without bleeding, but other than that, bleeding. It seriously can’t be healthy to bleed for six months!!! I need to see my doctor about it, but I fear that it will all be chalked up to the depo, and then I’ll be taken off of that and forced to go to some other method. And so far, this method is working out really well for me.

I’m not one of those people who easily remembers to take a pill everyday. I’ve never used a tampon, so the idea of the Nuva-Ring scares the heck out of me. I’ve been having sex without a condom, since I started having sex, and it doesn’t make any sense to me whatsoever to go back to it, when I’m only having sex with the father of my baby! I think before I think about it too much, I should just call my doctor tomorrow.

Tomorrow… It’s going to be a busy day. I’ve gotta walk Kaeidyn to school in the morning (YAY for Alfie working…), then I absolutely need to call H&R Block about getting my taxes done – which I’m hoping they’ll be able to do even though I don’t have ID (which I need to do something about sometime soon), I need to call a couple other places and hopefully go cash a check tomorrow.

It’s also Kenzie’s birthday tomorrow! He officially turns the big 4. We’ve sort of planned having a party for him on Saturday, though I don’t know exactly what we’re doing or where or what time or who’s coming. All details to figure out this week. It’s hard to believe that Kenzie’s been around for four years, he still seems so young. I’m totally recounting the story of his birth to him tomorrow. “It was a bright, sunny day. Don’t worry, at the end of this story there is great pain and gushes of blood…”

I started out today thinking it was going to suck hard, but it ended up being a pretty rocking day. First, I had to take Kaeidyn to school this morning. This week, they’re learning about nutrition, so everyday they’re cooking something. Yesterday was stone soup, today was buns. So she was so excited to go to school, that 6 AM she comes running into my room, “Mommy, I’m gonna be late for school.” Luckily I was able to get her back to bed until about 7.

Then Mama T picked Kaeidyn up from school, and came over to help get the cleaning more under control. Not what I had planned, but she ended up doing most of the work completely herself. I felt incredibly bad. But the kids room is spotless, the bathroom is cleaned and so are my stairs. She’s gonna come back over tomorrow, after I’ve got my room pretty much done, and we’re gonna try to get everything else done.

I think The Boyfriend was avoiding be enlisted for cleaning jobs, so he worked on the van. After a couple hours, and a few breaks, he was able to get the van back up and running. It took a little bit of investigation on his part, but he was able to turn it on, and we even went for a short ride with all the kids to go put air in the tires. It was so nice to finally be able to all travel to one place, at the same time, in the same vehicle. I’ve been hating that Carter gets to come for everything, while the other kids get left behind, usually with Alfie.

We had barbecued steak for dinner, which the kids loved. Ate two whole steaks between the three of them, which is pretty spectacular being that they normally share one piece of meat between the three of them. And now The Boyfriend and I are having barbecued sandwiches. He had thought that we had no propane left, and then today he tested it out and it turns out we still have a full tank.

Tomorrow, I’m gonna have to let Kenzie play games, because he was begging all day today, and I kept telling him to hold off and then it ended up being bed time, so he never got to play games. We got them Socker Boppers today, so that’s going to be fun tomorrow. They got to play for a little bit today, but not very long.

I felt so bad. The Boyfriend went to Timmies and I got him to take Carter with him. He comes back all in a hurry, and as he walks up the sidewalk, I start hearing Carter wailing. His eyes were all puffy, and he had cried the entire car ride. I felt so bad for him.

We have had alot of screaming around the house these last couple of days, thanks to flies. For some reason, all my kids have decided that they are deathly afraid of flies. They see one, and they start screaming, they can’t move, they cry. I hope it doesn’t happen all summer long…

Yesterday, we went to the exercise park and took two of the neighbor kids. After playing at the exercise park for awhile, we went over to the hill behind our house and all the kids went nuts rolling down the hill for probably close to half an hour. Then we went over to the little tiny park behind our house, where Kenzie proceeded to poop his pants. So we had to cut our park playing short so he could come home and get bathed. Good thing too, because he was disgusting. They had all been playing in the sandy dirt paths, and from head to foot were covered in dustiness.

I feel like a new woman today (too bad it’s not a new and extremely sexy woman…). I finally, after almost a year of not wearing one for any real length of time, bought and am wearing a bra. I went and picked up a three pack of these cool adjustable racer-back sports bras, and then a nice t-shirt bra. So I’m wearing the sports bra, and so far, I’m completely loving it. I hope I keep up with wearing a bra ūüėČ

The Boyfriend is officially on part-time. He’s been so worried about me telling people, because he doesn’t want to seem like the loser boyfriend. I keep assuring him that that’s not how he seems, or at least it’s not to me and that’s all that matters. If he was doing it because he didn’t want to work, then I’d think he was a loser. But that’s not the case at all. Not only can he not, but I can’t stand how much working full-time graveyards takes him away from us. Because it’s not just the night time he’s gone for.

During the days he has to sleep. His days off are mostly dedicated to sleep. It’s especially hard to have a family and work graveyards. He’s on his second night off, and so far it’s been wonderful. Two more nights of bliss!!!! The best part for me, is I won’t have to watch The Big Bang Theory or Parenthood alone anymore ūüėČ

It’s been an extremely long day, so long. I’ve run the gamut of emotions today, and I’m not even 100% sure why, but I know that it sucks. Luckily, it’s Saturday, which means that Gilmore Girls is on CMT, so there’s something to cheer me up.

It was an extremely stressful day with the kids today, even though Mama T took them out with Goober for a couple hours. They kept getting into stuff, yelling off the balcony, playing with the barbecue. Then they got home from the park, and immediately, they all rang off with, “Mommy, can we do this? Mommy, is it time for me to do this?”, and it was just like, “No, you can not put make up on, no you can’t play games, no you can’t go outside!”

I felt like I was repeating myself over and over again today. Keirnan ended up throwing a huge tantrum today. He wasn’t listening at all, and got sent down to his room. Instead of going down to his room, he sat at the top of the staircase. Well, Kenzie decided he was staircase monitor or something, because then we had him repeating over and over, “Keirnan’s still upstairs!”

I got up and carried him down to his room, where he began a huge tantrum of banging the walls, and screaming and crying. When I went in, he was shaking and had to catch his breath from all the freaking out. And unfortunately, it didn’t change his listening skills at all…

Alfie was here almost all day today, even though that wasn’t part of the plan for today at all. He played games almost all day, and by the time he left I could’ve killed him. I’m sick of having to ask him to do fatherly things, like helping with the discipline or checking on the kids outside. And I started thinking, at the height of my annoyance with him, “How did I ever get with him? What did I ever see in him?”, and I was all like, “He was different back then…”

But then I thought about it more, and no he absolutely wasn’t. I remember when I used to babysit my sister, Pikachu’s oldest kid, and Alfie and I were first dating. I went for a bath one night, and asked Alfie to keep an eye on the kid. Well, he was playing a game, and the kid ended up hitting his head and Alfie didn’t even notice or care. The second he gets into a game, he’s just so into it, that nothing else around him matters.

Then, I was on Facebook, and decided to check out The Boyfriend’s profile page, which almost never happens. I try very hard to avoid his Facebook, because it would probably spark a huge amount of jealousy or something, because he has so many girls on his Facebook. When Alfie and I were together, if they weren’t family, they didn’t get added. You can imagine how many girls were added once we broke up…

The last little while, I’ve been fighting that jealous suspicious girlfriend I don’t want to be monster really hard. A couple weeks back, The Boyfriend was talking to his ex on the computer, and it seemed like as soon as I started looking at the computer, he stopped talking. And while the whole talking to ex girlfriend thing hardly bothers me, the thought that he might be talking about our relationship to an ex girlfriend does.

No matter how I look at it, I come off as the thing that keeps ruining everyone’s life. I mean, with Alfie, I stole his childhood by getting pregnant so young, I stole his potential, forced him into something he really didn’t want, and was seriously a psychotic bitch. With The Boyfriend, I did him wrong in the very beginning of our relationship, I force Alfie on him constantly, I stole his young adulthood getting pregnant, when that wasn’t part of his plan at all. I’ve taken him from being a single guy, to a father of four in less than two years!!!

And now we have the crazy psychotic bitch of girlfriend thing creeping back up on us, from crazy mood swings to this new found jealousy or worry or something. So of course, the urge hits today to snoop. Pathetically so, because it’s never occurred to me to pay attention to his passwords or anything. I just went through his Facebook Wall Posts. And it made me incredibly sad.

Right afterwards, I literally wrote a status message saying that I missed the herb and garlic days. He used to be cheesy and all lovey dovey. He’d say these really sweet things like, “I wish I could fit Val into my pocket so I could take her to work with me.”, and he would write that publicly for everyone to see. Now the only thing he ever writes, is negative crap.

I’m not saying that he’s not still lovey dovey, but he’s not herb and garlic cheesy. He normally needs a prompt to say something sweet like, “Tell me something interesting…” And even when he does say something sweet, I hardly ever believe him.

It was so adorable today, he had Carter laughing the hardest I’ve ever heard him laugh. He was just punching his hand, and Carter was laughing hysterically. It was seriously the cutest thing ever, I totally wish I would’ve had a video camera.

The street is incredibly busy tonight. I hope it simmers down by the time that I want to go to bed, which I’m hoping isn’t too long from now.

So even though The Boyfriend let me sleep in until 11, and even though I went back down for a nap at 2:30, I am purely exhausted today. I literally just want to go back down to bed and sleep and do nothing else.

I hope that all the desire to sleep is just something to do with stress, and nothing more. Looks like Mama T will be coming over next week to help me do some of the cleaning around here, since it’s seriously gotten so out of control. I hate that I’m a 23-year-old woman who still needs her Mommy to come help her clean. But I can’t deny that I need the help.

Had to yell at the kids outside again today, this time for taking some sort of metal tool and smashing crap in the yard, and hitting the balconies with it. I went out and just yelled, “Go somewhere else!”, they ran. I’ve decided that the next time the kids are in the yard, and they’re ruining it in a way that will get me in trouble with my landlords, I’m just gonna go out there and be like, “Hey, can you take me to your parents?”, and then I’m gonna go and ask their parents nicely to try to keep their kids out of my yard. I can’t risk getting evicted because a bunch of young kids don’t know boundaries.

I need to start leaving my house every once and awhile… I’m starting to feel very isolated from the world. When I do leave the house, it’s just to go to Mama T’s, which isn’t really broadening my horizons, being that she lives a hop, skip and a jump away. I can’t wait until we get the van fixed (fingers crossed), so that we, as a family, can go places together. I can’t wait to start doing our walks again, especially now that we found the tandem stroller.

They’ll be no telling Keirnan to constantly speed up, because if he gets to slow, we can just put him in the stroller. And Carter likes the stroller, so that’s no problem. And there’s probably so many places around here, that we haven’t even begun to explore. I can’t wait for our first Edmonton Family Trip, like we’ve been talking about since Kaeidyn was born. I’m hoping this summer will be as fun as the last…

So again, I failed NaBloPoMo. A whole three days into it, and at first it wasn’t completely my fault. My timezone in WordPress wasn’t right, so when I posted at 11 something one night, it didn’t show up until after midnight. I’ve fixed the timezone issue.

Then I’ve had two days of complete and utter soreness, and the last thing I’ve wanted to do is sit in front of the computer. It’s absolutely horrible. I haven’t done anything really except for sitting on the couch. My entire body feels swollen (even though it’s not), and every bone feels brittle and like it’s on the verge of breaking. I feel weak and heavy and fragile… This kind of soreness isn’t that bad when it’s isolated to one area, but when it expands to your entire body, it’s intense and ridiculous. I’m completely sick of it.

I had written up a post a couple days ago of the exact same title (those of you following me on Twitter, might have followed a blank link…), and for some reason after I published it, the entire post disappeared. I wasn’t in the mood to write it up again then, so here’s my attempt…

The kids are all doing pretty wonderfully. Finally went for a nap today (after almost an entire week of planning everyday for a nap). Today was one of those days when a nap seemed completely out of the question, but somehow we managed to squeeze one in and it was wonderful. The best three hours I’ve had in awhile. The kids, even though they claimed they weren’t tired and instead wanted to just sit quietly in their room, actually fell asleep before I even tucked Carter and I in.

This morning, Alfie’s Mom and Step-Dad came and picked the kids up and took them shopping. They hadn’t seem them since Christmas, so it was a nice thing for them and they were so excited. Keirnan got the world’s most annoying bunny toy. You push a button, the bunny pops up and the thing (as loud as it can) goes, “Boing, Boing”. Kaeidyn got new earrings, so now she’s got five different pairs to pick from. So far, she’s liking the blue flowers The Boyfriend got her best. Kenzie got a Ben 10 game for the Wii, the first thing he did when he got home was play it, and now he’s been asking ever since.

That’s two days in a row that The Boyfriend and I have gotten a big chunk of time away from the older kids. Yesterday we had to go pick up a barbecue, because we’re both getting sick of not being able to cook anything thanks to the stupid load limiter. So Kenzie and Keirnan stayed with Alfie, and Kaeidyn and Carter went over to Mama T’s. The Boyfriend and I went shopping and it was beautiful.

Even though we were in the loudness of our local Wal-Mart, it was so nice and quiet. I seriously never realized how easy it is to take silence for granted. Because now, when it does happen, it is seriously the most comforting and relaxing thing I’ve ever experienced. And when I don’t have it, I wish that I did…

It was nice to finally get away from Carter for longer than five or ten minutes. He’s been such a mama suck lately, and of course, I’ve been letting him. So I imagine it’s going to get worse. None of the other kids were like this at all. I could leave them and they hardly noticed. They didn’t like to be held or cuddled that much, and when they did, it was normally by someone else. So I’ve never experienced this whole, “I want my Mommy all the time” thing. It’s truly extremely exhausting.

Waking up to Carter lately has been the most fun and annoying thing in the world. He’s gotten where he likes to pull himself up on everything. And I mean absolutely anything. Most days, I’ll wake up to him trying to stand by using my face as his support, and then him sucking on my hair. I think he’s seriously going to be walking before he’s sitting. He pulls himself up on the ottoman, he pulls himself up on the couch, the arm of the couch, legs. He loves to be standing. Though, do you think we could get him to sit by himself? Not a chance…

Keirnan is working really hard on picking up this whole talking thing. At least once a day, Kaeidyn starts saying words and will make him repeat after her. I’ve been trying the same thing. I can make out what he’s saying almost everytime he talks, but I think that’s just because I’m his Mom and not because he’s actually making any sense, because I seem to be the only one picking it up. He seems to only say the starting syllable in a word, and sentence structure is beyond him at this point.

Kaeidyn has been doing nothing but bugging me to put on make-up. Even after she’s just put some on, she’s asking to put more on. She’s still wearing make-up from before we went out yesterday, and the make-up that she put on at Mama T’s (she did both their make-up, and has been going off all day asking if Grandma’s called yet to get her hair fixed!), and she’s still asking if she can have some on. She’s been rhyming up a storm these last couple of days too. Mostly with made up words, but rhyming nonetheless.

Kenzie hasn’t been doing too much besides wanting to play his games. ¬†The good thing about the whole game playing thing, is he almost never wants to play alone anymore. He’s always asking people to play games with him. At Kaeidyn’s parent/teacher conference, since she’s in speech therapy, the teacher offered us an application to The Bright Beginnings program, which is a pre-kindergarten program for kids with special needs. She figured since Kaeidyn had speech problems, Kenzie might too.

I was going through the application the other day and I don’t think Kenzie qualifies at all. He already talks better than Kaeidyn, in his own right. Kaeidyn seems to understand bigger concepts than he does, but Kenzie puts the ‘s’ where it’s supposed to be in words. I was sitting on the couch reading with them the other day, which doesn’t happen nearly as often as I would like, and Kenzie seemed to understand his colors really well and his numbers too. So I don’t think I’ll be trying to get him into The Bright Beginnings Program, maybe Keirnan when he turns three or four though.

I’ve been craving a different look for my dull, plain and ridiculously shapeless hair. So when we went and got the barbecue yesterday, we picked me up some hair rollers, so hopefully I’ll be able to get some ringlets going, as soon as I get the energy to actually put them in my hair. I’ve been buying so many girly products lately, that you’d actually believe that I was a girl… It’s different to say the least.

Well, it’s officially time for me to decide what we’re going to barbecue tonight. It’s either gonna be pork or chicken. Gotta get The Boyfriend to spark it up because I’m afraid of propane ūüėČ Yay for the load limiter and barbecuing when it feels like winter outside.

Tomorrow’s gonna be an exciting day, because Goober gets to come home for a couple hours. We’re all going over to Mama T’s for a visit and it’s going to be good, I hope. I hope the stress of the visit (and the lack of the institution – I know that was really hard for me) isn’t too much for him and he’s fine when he goes back. The kids are really excited to see him too.